Sunday, October 08, 2006
I'b god a COWD! - True confessions of an insomniac
Man its 2 weeks of just joy - everyone loves being sick right! Last week I had to quit drinking coffee and deal with the stress issues in my life to help me in my sleeping patterns - not wanting to go to bed until 3am is natural right? Of course the result is a need to nap at 2pm every day (okay sleep) until dinner time.... This week it was you guessed it a cold - as the stress left and my immunities came back I got the cold that has been circulating the dorms and it hit me nice and hard. I beat it into submission and it did not become a sinus infection but was not careful enough and get to enjoy the end of this stupid chest cold (how many more days of cauffing can there be?)
Sickness sure slows you down and this past week in class I found out though the stress is gone I've got several markers indicating I'm carrying the world again (or trying to). According to the ProQOL: Professional Quality of Life Screening I am alittle out of the healthy range right now in my Compassion Satisfaction. I am more than double the mean (and 17 out of the healthy range) on Burnout. Most importantly I found that carrying OTHER PEOPLE'S loads I have a Compassion Fatigue of 27 and the mean is 13 and the healthy range ends at 19. I plan on retaking the test on the 19th and commenting on my change in scores (in 2 weeks of the 4 needed to be looked at for this test).
The lesson - I'm going to be more heartless! Yeah, right! Like I could be if I tried. I'm going to make sure that my pains are being shared (hopefully not my sicknesses). I've started admitting what I can't do anything about and if I'm finding myself in areas I can't help and know they need it making sure the pains are being passed on to SOMEONE WHO CAN HELP. The other thing I've had to realize is my volunteering (who is just me), schooling, and friends are all part of who I am and it is ME who is responsible for making them work. Its said in some wisdom - "Sometimes you are the window and sometimes you are the bug". I realize sometimes I'll be working near burnout, but how I work and the friends I keep that keep me from fading away.
Sickness sure slows you down and this past week in class I found out though the stress is gone I've got several markers indicating I'm carrying the world again (or trying to). According to the ProQOL: Professional Quality of Life Screening I am alittle out of the healthy range right now in my Compassion Satisfaction. I am more than double the mean (and 17 out of the healthy range) on Burnout. Most importantly I found that carrying OTHER PEOPLE'S loads I have a Compassion Fatigue of 27 and the mean is 13 and the healthy range ends at 19. I plan on retaking the test on the 19th and commenting on my change in scores (in 2 weeks of the 4 needed to be looked at for this test).
The lesson - I'm going to be more heartless! Yeah, right! Like I could be if I tried. I'm going to make sure that my pains are being shared (hopefully not my sicknesses). I've started admitting what I can't do anything about and if I'm finding myself in areas I can't help and know they need it making sure the pains are being passed on to SOMEONE WHO CAN HELP. The other thing I've had to realize is my volunteering (who is just me), schooling, and friends are all part of who I am and it is ME who is responsible for making them work. Its said in some wisdom - "Sometimes you are the window and sometimes you are the bug". I realize sometimes I'll be working near burnout, but how I work and the friends I keep that keep me from fading away.
Subscribe to Posts [Atom]