Why Be Good When Your Best Isn't Good Enough?

I started a fast from sarcasm and caffein 3 days ago. What does this mean? I means no caffein or sarcasm for 40 days which ends on April 2nd, 2007. I chose the 2 because they each represent a problem in my life one is an addiction of things I put in my and the other is an addiction of things coming out of me Simplified, caffein represents how I've failed to tame my body and I've let addiction take control and my body dictate what I feed it.; sarcasm represents how far my heart and mind have gone and I've failed to curb them to a point where I have to start at what comes out of my lips and work back towards my mind and then my heart (I only pray I have mind control after 40 day).

How have I done so far? Well the caffein is easy to keep out and I have had to start napping to get my engergy back up, but its good. Sarcasm while I've been fighting this energy zapping is difficult though sarcasm has left my lips three times, I've had to stop and reflect on 5 other times my mind has thought it. This will be my hardest battle and I knew that going in.

The fact I chose to do this on lent and during midterms another headach unto itself. The good news is midterms are over - JOY OH JOY! Think about this I don't have to write another midterm unless I want to... wait a sec I wrote the last 6 semesters worth because I wanted to... Go figure. The battle is better from here on (I only have 9 things do do between now and then paper wise - the best part is I'll have 2 of them done before tomorrow, so don't worry).

As when I've fasted food in the past I've noticed that I notice things more. Is that natural I don't know - without coffee the smell of ground coffee is YiYiYi (or as the French say it OHlala!) and the taste I know will be even better should I chose to taste another taste from the April 2nd on. I've started reading again a book that I haven't read for my own ENJOYMENT in a long long time, the Bible. I've discovered that as many choose Luke or Matthew or Paul as their inspired writes of the New Testament I'm so drawn to John. If you read his books you read his views on grace, love and people AND the measure it takes to love God; this was also the guy who after evangelizing a city walked out with disgust and asked Jesus to shower meteors down on it. I could get into this guy a heart like no other, but still faces the frustrations and needs to be showered grace as he learned wisdom and if you read 1st, 2nd & 3rd John you'll see he learned wisdom.

I promised this would never be a Bible lesson, so let me tell you more about this coming week. It is Spring Break, so time for me to write, play, and play some more. I'm excited about that. I hope to see my sister but that is depending on there being someone to take my work shifts. Life is good and I feel good and think good right now. I hope you are all doing well! Please reply and let me know what is going on....